Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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