I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
