whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
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