sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
