TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
