I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
