I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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