I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
