he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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