The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize