Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
