Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Randomize
