So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Randomize
