dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
