so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
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