Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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