people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
