its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
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