ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
