so explain again why im purple
no
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
