found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
im on a boat
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