he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
