i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
