just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize