Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
