How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
