so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
