I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Randomize
