i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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