bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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