Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
