glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Randomize
