You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
