Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
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