matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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