shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Randomize
