Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
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