lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize