Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Randomize
