This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Randomize
