I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
