Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
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