I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
We talked him into tasing himself.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Randomize
