***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
