he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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