We won't sleep together?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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