I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
