Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
