drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
