he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
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