the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
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