did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
