Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize