everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
